However, it was a totally different story once we hit the streets. We went to a bustling urban square where, literally, everywhere I turned I’d see a group of hijabis. It was such a great sight to see and it surprised me that I saw more girls wearing hijab in this European country than on my American college campus, where we pride ourselves on having such a large Muslim community. And, ladies, these German hijabis had mastered scarf styles that I have never seen before and were rocking fashion that literally made me do double takes.

I took a seat on a bench next to a fabulously groomed tree (haha I’m serious!), where within minutes a young woman wearing trendy business attire and sporting a cute short haircut took a seat next to me. Her name was Malia, and after kicking up a convo with her, she told me that she was an Afghan Muslim working at a nearby restaurant. I took the opportunity to ask her about the Muslim lifestyle here. She told me that Germany is good at protecting the religious freedom of Muslims, but it isn’t as eagerly accepted by the society.

Though she didn’t wear the hijab, she made it a point to tell me that the other women in her family choose to wear it, and there is a huge discrepancy between how she and the hijab-wearing ladies are treated in their day-to-day lives. She shared that she doesn’t feel she is treated differently at all, but it in fact is much harder to get a job if you wear the hijab. If she and I were both going for the same job and I had more experience than her, she said that she would get the job instead of me. The dealbreaker? My hijab.

She also mentioned that she occasionally sees women wearing the burqa, and, like its French neighbor, it’s not viewed in the best light. Though Germany allows the freedom for Muslim women to dress however they want, the general public opinion is that the burqa is frightening, strange, and ultimately rejected. She also painfully told me about a German author (she couldn’t remember his exact name) who recently published a book entirely bashing Islam, saying that Muslims in Germany don’t work, are threatening, and seemingly burdens on society. In the same breath she also knew that there was a prominent Muslim politician working in the government.

I’m sitting at an outdoor coffeehouse right now, and the German weather is getting rather chilly so I guess I’ll have to rap this up! It was such a great opportunity to meet Malia and hear about Islam in Germany from the perspective of a young Muslim woman. It’s always eyeopening to see how our religion is lived and perceived in other countries!

“The world is on the verge of a nuclear-meltdown. Japan is inside-out. Civilians are being killed in Libya, Bahrain and Yemen. The Palestinians are still being starved while shot at. Pakistan and Australia are trying to recover from devastation. But lets all turn our attention to some 13 year-old wanna be pop star with no talent for music, shall we?”

A disastrous earthquake and Tsunami hits Japan, leaving hundreds dead, injured, and displaced as their buildings and homes lie in shambles. Leaking radiation from damaged Japanese nuclear power plants are threatening not only the lives of the people around them, but possibly those living outside the country as well. Massacres are being committed by the thousands as revolutionary protests sweep over Syria, Yemen, Bahrain, and other Middle Eastern countries. And when things couldn’t get any worse, American and British forces decide to militarily intervene in Libya to stop Muammar Ghaddafi and his pro-government forces from murdering every single one of his people.  It seems as if the whole world has been turned upside down in a span of only two months. But in spite of all the chaos and destruction that was caused, we have done nothing to help turn the world right-side up again.

Where were we when we heard about our brothers and sisters in Bahrain and Libya being murdered  in cold blood by government forces that wanted to deprive them of their freedom? What did we do when news broke out that a devastating 8.9 earthquake struck the lands of Japan, killing almost everyone and everything in its path? Did we actually try to aid them as best as we could? Or did we just click our tongues in dismay as we sat down and idly scrolled through the news on our laptops and smartphones? This doesn’t only apply to what’s happening in the Middle East or the earthquake, but what happens on a daily basis, like the struggles that Palestinians have to suffer through in their own homeland, for example. Or perhaps just as frightening – the struggles that Muslims are continually facing in the West, amidst the Peter King hearings and the increased rise of Islamophobia.

Yet a majority of us still choose to remain silent. Instead of doing anything, we decide to turn our attention to much more insignificant matters, such as the hype with Rebecca Black’s notorious “Friday” video.  ”What could we possibly do to make a difference?” we convince ourselves. “Someone else who is in a much stronger position than we are will solve everything for us. It’ll all be over soon.” But what if this presumed “hero” never comes? What then will become of our problems if none of us are willing to stand up and do something about them?

We can make a change. We can make a difference. If ordinary people were able to get together in Tunisia and Egypt and topple two of the world’s most long-standing, brutal dictators, then we could definitely topple the problems that we face now, and even more. But that doesn’t mean we have to go out and start fighting for our lives in order to make things happen. With the advancement of computer technology and the widespread use of social-networking websites like Twitter and Facebook, we now have the power to create our own content and share our messages with the world. With these networking tools at our fingertips, we have the potential to form ideas and projects that were once thought impossible. Instead of using Facebook to fill up your free time, why not use it to organize a fundraiser to help raise money for those who are suffering in Japan and Libya? Or how about create a Facebook page that could raise awareness to the discrimination Muslims are facing in the West and what we could do to stop it? For those who are not social-network savvy, organized protests and community service events could be created to help out those in need as well. With the help of Allah (SWT) , our courage, and the right kind of tools in our hands, there’s no telling to what we could do!

Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said:

“Whoever from amongst you sees an evil he should change it with his hand and if he is not able to, then with his tongue and if he is not able to, then he should hate it in his heart, and that is the weakest level of faith.”

It is our duty as Muslims to enjoin the good and forbid the evil even if it may be in the smallest way possible. If we stop saying “we can’t” and start saying “we will”, then insha Allah our world, this world, will become a much better place.

1. A Variety of Scarves (and Pins)

The hijab is one of the most promising and rewarding aspects of a Muslimahs life, but to Muslim fashionistas everywhere, it’s an accessory as well. By having a collection of hijabs in different patterns, colors and material, a simple outfit could be transformed from casual to dressy, or day to night. An eclectic collection of hijabs allows a woman to maintain her modesty, as well as fulfill her passion for fashion. For girls who don’t wear the hijab, having a wide collection of scarves is valuable to throw on when you’re wearing a top that might be too low-cut, to spice up an outfit, or even to collect in a drawer in case you are thinking of wearing the hijab in the future insha’Allah.

1. A Crinkle in Time Scarf in Red ($16) modcloth.com
2. Smooth Operator Scarf ($7.99) usa.frenchconnection.com
3. Scarf Tribe Mustard ($42) welikefashion.com
4. Scarf Tribe Tan ($42) welikefashion.com
5. Green Scarf (stripes) ($15) scarfworld.com
6. Blue Floral Scarf ($20) delias.com
7. Creating Continuity Scarf ($35) modcloth.com
8. Yumi Leopard print Scarf ($24) houseoffraser.co.uk
9. Wholesale Strip Leopard Pattern Long Scarf ($32) dinodirect.com
*Pins can be bought from any local arts & crafts store

2. Boyfriend Cardigan

The easiest way to cover up is a simple, yet classic boyfriend cardigan. These long, usually loose fitting sweaters offer a smart solution to sleeveless shirts or a modest addition to the simple t-shirt and jeans look.

1. Oasis Chevron Stripe Boyfriend Cardigan (15 GBP) houseoffraser.co.uk
2. Boyfriend Pocket Cardigan ($15) alloy.com
3. Boyfriend Cardigan Khaki (30 GBP) houseoffraser.co.uk
4. Oasis Patch Pocket Boyfriend Cardigan (10 GBP) houseoffraser.co.uk

3. Baby Doll Dress (as a shirt)

The baby doll dress is a short, empire waist dress. The cut is flattering to many, if not all, body types. Baby doll dresses can be found with full length sleeves, and can be an appropriate length. However, if you’re not that lucky, grab a cardigan or blazer and a pair of jeans, and you have yourself a stylish and modest top! Many dresses can be worn as shirts, depending on length and material. If too long or too poufy, the dress will look awkward and unflattering with a pair of pants underneath. The key is to make the dress look as much like a shirt as possible. This can be easily done with these examples below:

1. Washed Satin Baby doll Dress ($31) shopplasticland.com
2. Ladies Polka Dot Baby doll Dress (16 GBP) Peacocks.co.uk
3. Ladies Pleated Baby doll Dress (22 GBP) peacocks.co.uk
4. Daytrip Baby doll Dress ($26) buckle.com

4. Maxi Dress

The maxi dress is the ultimate ‘go-to’ outfit for any woman, especially a Muslimah. Whether it be a cardigan, sweater, blazer, or jean jacket, a maxi dress is usually very easy to cover up. Maxi dresses can be worn casually, or for more formal occasions, making them very versatile. With remaining modest, there are certain things to keep in mind. An important thing is to make sure that the maxi dress is full length, and not ankle length. Also, many maxis are made with light material, making them transparent in light, so an underdress may be necessary sometimes. Finally, maxis come in various shapes, making some tighter than others, so it’s important to remember to keep it comfortable and keep it loose.

1. Black Print Maxi Dress (30 GBP) dorothyperkins.com
2. Strapless Splash Maxi (30 GBP) axparis.co.uk
3. Purple Neck Frill Maxi Dress (28 GBP) dorothyperkins.com
4. Womens Miso Leopard Print Maxi Dress (30 GBP) republic.co.uk
5. Strapless Flower Print Maxi Dress (30 GBP) axparis.co.uk

5. Jeans

Jeans, jeans and more jeans! Jeans are such an important staple to every woman, of every shape and every lifestyle. There are so many styles to choose from, especially with all those jean trends appearing everywhere. Most of these trends, like the torn or skinny jean, are not hijabi-friendly. Thankfully, there are many other very hijab friendly cuts and styles. If they’re modest fitting, like the boyfriend jean, wide leg jean, or straight leg, then they’re hijabi approved! Remember that just because jeans are not skin tight, doesn’t mean that they have to be ill-fitting, just find the right cut for your body type.

1. Boyfriend Jean ($30) ae.com
2. Unionbay Indiana Stretch Boyfriend Jean ($15) alloy.com
3. Truck Jeans Embroidered Stretch Wide Leg Jean ($20) alloy.com

Ghibah (Gossip) is something that is very frowned upon in Islam. As Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said,

“A person may utter a word he thinks harmless, which results in his falling the depth of seventy years into hellfire.”

I know resisting to gossip is hard. And I also know how abundant it is in our society today. BUT I can also tell you that there are several things you can do to avoid it all.

It’s a Small World

Always remember that whatever is circulating might just come back to the person it is about. Do you really want to have your name on that sin? Also realize that once you are a labeled gossip, you might not be seen as so trustworthy. Therefore, some of your closest friends might find it hard to come to you. Gossiping can lead to many things, including broken friendships and trust.

Silence is Golden

Secondly, try not to listen to the gossip. You know which of your friends is the ‘social butterfly,’ so try to engage in other conversations with her. If she somehow manages to bring up something about another person, remain silent. You do not have to answer in any way, unless it is to disprove her statement. Yes, it is wrong to be talking about another person, good or bad, but if you are doing it for the sake of helping them, then it is perfectly fine (just be sure you are positive about what you say.) For example:

LeilaGossip: “Oh did you hear about Dina? She’s thinking about breaking up with Ahmed.”
You: “.. Hmm, I was just talking to Dina the other day and she said everything is fine.”

Dip Out

Thirdly, do no get caught up on gossipy conversations. For example- you are out with a group of girls at a restaurant and as you are waiting for the food to arrive, Soaad brings up something about Somaya which creates a huge topic of conversation. Simply excuse yourself and go to the restroom. This is the best way to eliminate yourself from the conversation and avoid temptation to respond.

“Speaking of!.. What did you think of that…”

Interrupting a gossip session with a different topic also seems to work very well. Say your friends are too busy talking about Mustafa and how he really wasn’t playing that well during last week’s soccer game. Instead of continuing the banter about Mustafa, bring up something about another sport. Like: “Did you see that match on ESPN last night?” Hopefully, they would get the hint and stop talking about Mustafa.

There you have it, girls. There are many ways to avoid the ever growing problem of gossip- especially in the female world. If every person tries to withhold their judgments, I’m sure this world will be a much happier and better place insha’Allah. Remember, Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said,

“The one who adheres to the lengthy silence (except from that which is good) will be saved on the Day of Judgment.”

The more we stick to this way of interacting, the more it will become the natural thing to do. Sooner or later, these pesky gossipers will have nobody to tell their juicy news to. Also, we will be able to raise our children to be the same way and help make the world that much better.

Salams for now!

The Middle East, which has always been accompanied with words such as backward, third world, fundamentalist, and many other derogatory terms, is showing the world that its people are the most willing to sacrifice for a taste of freedom and democracy. They sent a clear message to the imperialist governments of the world: we do not need you to bomb our countries to give us your democracy; we will fight for it, and we will win. As Ghandi once said, “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.” The Middle East has once again become the teacher, and the world, its students.

Unfortunately, some revolutions, such as Libya, were not given the choice of a peaceful revolution, but their sacrifice for freedom has left the world at a loss for words and humbled us all in front of their struggle. Yet, one cannot deny that the same generation that has been looked down upon is now gaining momentum and strength without the guide of its elders, but rather through each other and the power of technology. Now, the youth have gained recognition as the leaders of the revolutions that have changed the world in the course of a mere few months.

Let me end with an homage to these young leaders through the poetic words of the late Nizar Qabbani:

“Arab children,
Corn ears of the future,
You will break our chains,
Kill the opium in our heads,
Kill the illusions.
Arab children,
Spring rain,
Corn ears of the future,
You are the generation
That will overcome defeat.”

To a free Palestine, to a free Muslim world, to a free tomorrow, insha’Allah.

Congratulations.

“Prophet Muhammad (SAW)  taught us that Faith is never static. It increases and decreases, or waxes and wanes. It is our responsibility to assess where our faith is, and make it our duty to constantly work towards improving it.”¹

It is a sunny, yet chilly Wednesday morning, as I sit inside one of my university’s campus lounges, feverishly going over class notes for a midterm exam that I would take  in two hours. I knew I should have studied harder, I think sourly to myself, sulking through the load of reading material before me. With so much to cover and so little time, there’s just no way I’ll be able to get through this exam with a passing grade. I continue to study for the next hour or so, until I am greeted by one of my friends. Happy to see her (and to escape from the anxiety of midterm cramming), I give her my salams and offer her a seat next to me. But to my surprise, our conversation doesn’t start off with school-related matters or our exams. Instead, my friend turns to me and says, “I feel like my Iman  is weak. I’m starting to have doubts about practices that I’ve been following for so long, and its bothering me. Why are these thoughts suddenly coming to me now?”

I was taken aback by her words. Of course, I gave her the best advice I could, reminding her that its normal for her Iman to fluctuate every now and then, as Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said that no Muslim’s Iman is ever static. As long as she remains strong against these thoughts and strives to make changes to improve her strength in Islam each day, she will be okay. But as I sought to comfort my friend, the shock her words gave me would not wear off – not because of the nature of her situation – but because of how much I could relate to it. Little did my friend know that my words of advice were also a reminder to myself, that I shouldn’t also give up, that my Iman needed just as much fixing up as did hers, as it had also grown weak.

As my friend and I continued our discussion, my pre-exam anxiety feelings drifted away and I began to realize how much the strength of my faith had deteriorated. This was my first time at a university, and I was exposed to a new environment unlike the one I was in three years ago, an Islamic community surrounded by my family and friends. While my worst expectations weren’t realized, a lot of the changes that I had to adjust to affected my Iman on some level. The scheduling of my classes prevented me from praying on time, which led me to neglect some of my prayers entirely. The company I felt with my family and friends back in high school was no longer with me in college; I wondered if my personality had anything to do with it and whether I should drop my interests so I wouldn’t have to feel so lonely. It was not only inside university, but outside of  it that my Islamic practices began to plummet. I became lazy and my heart lost the desire and love it once felt for Islam; thoughts, just like those of my friend, were starting to cloud my mind too. I knew deep down that I still loved Allah (SWT), but my actions were not strong enough to show it.

Time and again I repeatedly tried to change myself by doing something, anything to regain the “Iman Rush” that I had once felt, but each of my attempts were in vain. I’d begin to pray on time, or make dhikr, only to lose momentum and become lazy again. I believed that I needed to jump back into the ocean in order to collect all those fish at once. And when that didn’t work, to me, there was just no other way.

When my friend approached me an hour before my midterm exam on Wednesday to tell me of her troubles, I realized that I wasn’t alone, that I wasn’t the only Muslim who was struggling with her Iman. There are other Muslims out there like my friend who wish to strengthen their faith and keep themselves from straying away from their purpose in life. And that’s when it hits me – Iman isn’t something that could be easily perfected overnight. It’s a continuous process of improvement and growth, shaped by the trials of life and the manner in which we handle those trials. As long as we keep trying and don’t give up, our Iman will remain leveled in our favor.

So instead of jumping directly into the ocean for those fish, why don’t we try to catch them using a fishing rod instead? Step by step, closer and closer, we will reach the original amount of fish we aimed for, and more.

1. http://www.islamawareness.net/Faith/weakness.html

What do you think?

An Awkward Pair

You have been planning on meeting at the local restaurant for a get together and you seem to be earlier than all your friends. It also just so happens that Omar, another friend, is also early. What to do? Well for one thing, never panic, because it only leads to unnecessary awkwardness. Simply engage in casual conversation at the waiting area until your friends finally arrive. If the hostess offers to seat you, politely ask for some time so that the rest of the party can arrive. This way, you and Omar are not sitting at a table alone where suspicious eyes may spot you. Also, according to etiquette, one must wait until at least half of the party has arrived before getting seated. So it’s a win-win.

Hello-Goodbye

This may not be an issue (hopefully) with Muslim guy friends; however it is quite popular with other cases. After procrastinating that research paper for your Literature Theory class, you are in a fight against time to get it done. What better place to do so than at the library? Walking in, you barely make it ten feet before your name is called. You soon realize Joshua, the guys who sits behind you in Chemistry wants to say hello. It’s like slow motion- his arms opening, his body growing closer and closer to you. What do you do? For one thing, there is a much more efficient method than instantly going into ninja-mode and pushing him away. Simply, put your hand out, insinuating your request for a handshake. Sure, it’s a little awkward, but at the same time you show him that you respect him and still want to maintain a friendship. The good thing is, after one encounter like this one, it is most probable that the guy will just go for the handshake the next time. Another method is more straight forward. When Josh goes in for the hug, you can tell him the truth- “I’m sorry, it’s against my religion to hug guys, but it’s great to see you!”- This way, you are still being friendly, but are laying down the boundary.

Plans for Two?—Or Three..

That chemistry test is getting closer and closer! Luckily, a few of your friends are taking the same class with you. Again, let’s stick with Omar. Thinking two heads are better than one, Omar asks you if you would like to go to the library for a study session. There are many ways to go with this. Depending on your comfort level, you can agree to go with Omar. However, you must ensure that it is a public place with many others around. As always there is another route you can take. Agree to Omar’s request and subtly invite another friend who happens to also be in Chemistry– “Sure! Sounds great. I’ll ask Fatima if she’s up for it as well!” -Who knows, maybe it will turn into a big study group instead of just you two! This way, you have not offended Omar and get a chance to improve your grade!

A main thing you must remember is that it is never good to inhibit yourself from making friends. Having guy friends can be beneficial for they are completely different and can give you a new perspective about a few things. As long as you stay true to yourself and Islam, a friendship with a guy can be a very successful one based on respect and mutual understanding. Remember: it should never be black or white. Hopefully these tips above help you girls out! If anyone needs a few more pointers feel free to go to the advice column and I’ll be more than happy to help!